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Trauma of emotions

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Tawqeer Ul Nisa
I was struggling through the trauma of my own emotions
I tell myself that everything’s gonna be alright,.
The choices I made,
Affected me in all those ways.
The mistakes I made have not been forgotten.
The tears I shed, the sounds I made, the feelings
I’m not the same, my words are un-said.
What I hide, is buried deep inside my heart.
To know, to love, to breathe.
It hurts to know that I’ll never be the
girl I used to be. The one that would always laugh,
The one that you knew would always be strong.
The girl is not strong anymore being stronger day by day collapsed into her own burden of struggle.
I cry in the dark, because I know there is no one who could wipe out my all tears and wounds
The wounds and scars in the heart are real
If you only knew what I’ve been through,
Or maybe you could take a walk in my shoes.
I’m not fake, I’m not a doll,
I just don’t think I’m the same in any way.
So where did my soul go?
Why did I ever let it run away?
What happened to that girl?
One that could make you laugh,
What happened to that girl,
Becoz I’m lost in my own soul?
I’m no longer me, the mistakes changed me,
If only I would know! where she is lost
Her own chaos could not bring her back.
(The author is a student and can be reached at tawqeerulnisa@gmail.com)

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