The Knowledge of English
K S S Pillai
When a judge dismissed a petition saying that it was ‘floccinaucinihilipilification’, many raised their eyebrows in confusion and rushed to the nearest dictionary to find out what he meant. They murmured later that the judge could have said that the petition was without merit.
Many people use long-winded, complicated, confusing, and bombastic words to show their mastery over the English language. Whenever I watch televised cricket matches, I find captains, referees, and others speaking in rapid English before the mikes, leaving me wondering what they meant.
One day, I was surprised to hear one of my neighbours talking loudly in English. When I told a friend I had thought that he didn’t know the language, he laughed and said, “He speaks English only when he is drunk.” In some cinemas, characters speak English to advertise that they are educated.
Another day, a customer asked a trader friend: “How are the balloons?” When the latter kept mum, the customer said, “You don’t know English?” The trader then quipped, “If you want to know the price of balloons, you should use the words, ‘how much’”.
The murder of the language started years ago, when telegrams were drafted with a minimum of words to save money. People then sent telegrams in English, discarding all rules of grammar.
They were sent only to convey important messages, such as that of death. I recall a film in which many serious-faced people accompanied the postman with a telegram, certain that the addressee’s son, who was working in another part of the country, had died.
The addressee also started wailing when told that there was a telegram. All heaved a sigh of relief when the postman, who was the only one who could read English, said that the telegram was about the impending arrival of her son. I also come across several acronyms, such as ASAP, in the stories I read, where characters seem to be familiar with them.
People are confused when different words are written with different spellings, and both are considered correct. Only a few know that these words have different spellings in British and American English.
In a film, it was hilarious to see a judge correcting the proof of his daughter’s wedding invitation in English. He corrects several printing mistakes like ‘presence’ instead of ‘presents’ (it was printed, ‘Your presents will be appreciated), ‘weds’ instead of ‘wets’, and ‘groom’ in place of ‘goon’.
It has become a fashion for people to send their children to English-medium schools. Even the poor people have no hesitation in spending nights outside such schools when admission forms are expected to be distributed in the morning.
Those schools charge heavily. Years ago, there were only two schools with English medium in my city, where people from outside the State, or those on Central Government employment whose services could be transferred to any corner of the country, used to send their children. The rich sent their children to such schools, as they were expected to join a technical college with an English medium after passing the HSC examination.
During elections, some political parties in the South tell people that the North wants to eliminate the Dravidian culture by introducing the three-language formula. Many spoke against other languages to get votes. Most schools had the local language as the medium of instruction. English teachers used to teach the subject in the local language, or they translated the English texts into the mother tongue. As education was a state subject in the past, English was taught only from the 8th standard in the State where I taught English.
Agriculture was taught in the local language in the State where I worked. As all important books were in English, the students of my college, to everyone’s surprise, went on strike, demanding English as the medium of instruction.
Some students are so defeatist that they are certain not to score more than passing marks in English. They don’t even read English newspapers subscribed to by the college library or read anything in English. Those who are deputed to agriculture colleges to improve their qualification are convinced from the beginning that they cannot get good marks in English and resort to other actions instead of trying to improve their hold on the language.
(The author is a retired professor of English. He is a regular contributor to ‘The Kashmir Vision’. His short stories and articles have appeared in several national and international publications)
