Over-aged and un-married: Wherein lies the rub?
By: Peer Faizaan Bashir
If only I had dreamt of the upcoming horrible issues! The situation is exacerbating each passing day sometimes succumbing to devour the poison and sometimes of strangulating herself with a rope. ‘What to do?’” a person asked me.
His gloomy eyes, face defined by melancholia, and a series of pathetic expressions- all were the cues that he was being dragged to suicidal depression by something.
Whilst listening to his words, I couldn’t comprehend what actually he was trying to say. Confused, I asked him what the matter was. And he unleashed what had been unnerving him.
“You know, she (his sister) has crossed almost above forty years of age. And, whenever she faces a guy for a match, she gets rejected.” the man muttered with utter dismay.
“A few days ago, being accustomed as I was to check the whole bungalow of ours before going to sleep to get to know if everything was in accordance, I smelt something cigarette like fragrance. And upon peering from the edge of the window – I was stunned and shocked to see my sister puffing at something strange and talking to herself that, `Mai barbaad horahe hoon- Mujhsay kon shadi kareyga’ (That I am being ruined- who will marry me?),” he narrated.
Who – or what – is responsible for our delaying marriages? Is it because of some man-made complications in our marriage system that has made it hard for a person to even think of marriage? Is it because of the dowry system- which, I must mention, to the great extent, has been throwing its dreadful effects onto those who hardly manage to make both ends meet?
The dire need of the hour is to ask ourselves and contemplate over things that obstruct us from marrying at the right time. If the things that obstruct us from marrying at the most appropriate time can be resolved at an individual level, let’s do it.
At the same time, we must not overlook and instead speak against the social evils that have crept everywhere here in this piece of the planet – be it unnecessary dozens of dishes in Kashmiri cuisine, or the exchange of heavy load of golden items – for they affect the destitute in every possible way: and the now-costly marriages are no exception.
