Differentiating between real and forged love
Bashir Ahmad Dar
Brutal and bitter the winter was at its peak and the bone chilling cold was in its full sting. Visibility was dim and earth seemed lifeless. The trees had lost their foliage in the gone by autumn, leaving their ebony bodies at the mercy of callous winter. The world had taken a nap, and every single blade of grass had wilted in the fields. Cold had confined the birds to their nests, and the vast lake was bereft of all its companions-save the frost and mist.
Far away from the hustle and bustle of city life, a Baba (sage), in his mud shack, at the top of a hill, was pondering over the fragility of the world. He was wondering over the hoax of fake promises of life, insensitivity and unthankful traits of man towards the blessings of Allah. The sage was a middle aged man who had conquered more than half of the world on foot, and had seen the thick and thin of life closely. His personality was oozing out profound dignity, and wisdom was tripping from his words.
Amid strange silence, he let his eyes fall on the vast lifeless fields which seemed stretch from East to west, awash in dim sunlight, divorced of warmth and caught sight of a man approaching his abode. As the man neared the sage, his features became clear to the later. The man was dressed soberly and sober were his hair on head and face. His tattered clothes, dirty rough hair on skull, and inappropriately long beard shamed all his worldly desires. His stone grim look on face was depicting the perpetual pain of his heart.
As the man neared enough to be audible to sage, the former yelled, “Oh wise Baba, a hope to hopeless, I’m in pain and distress. Agony, misery and torment are hovering over me. My life has become a virtual hell and often I pray to die. I did everything in book to free myself, off the perturbation and pain but all in vain.
Instead, it kept increasing. Nothing seems providing solace to my aching heart, and nothing serene my inner tempest. But, now that I have heard high of your sagacity, that you cure the pain by a mere blow of spell, that your abode is the abode of peace, that none returns untreated from your shack. I too have come to your feet with strong belief that you will cure me too”.
Baba was shell shocked to see the helplessness of man behind his painful and incoherent words. He got up, went close to the man, greeted him, held his hand and took him inside his shack. He spread the straw and made him rest his body there. He gave him water and comforted him nicely and then asked him with much tenderness, “Who are you and what is ailing you?” There was a taste of kindness and love in Baba’s words which encouraged the man to narrate his sad tale.
“I am Abdullah” He said.
“Son of whom?” Baba interrupted quickly.
And the man answers, “Son of Hameed and Sara from valley of springs,” the man continued. “Two years ago, I and Gulshan, a beautiful lady from my land, met at the annual college function. Her amazing beauty enslaved me and I fell madly in love with her. It was love at first sight. Her mesmerizing beauty enchanted my heart, pulsated it fast, and filled it with desire to have her as my life partner. Her long dark hair and deep wild eyes seduced me. Her mere looks would have had butterflies in my stomach. I began to feel her presence everywhere, in college, at home, on road and in books. I tried to resist my feelings but you see, a storm can’t be silenced. At last, one fine day, I sent a love letter to her, nicely drafted and carrying all my feelings and my contact number. It contained my proposal for a love affair and a promise to marry her. She accepted my proposal, and thus, opened a new chapter of my life. A new beginning which changed everything, and made me what I am today.
We kept meeting every day. First in college, and after our college was over, the meetings shifted to the bank of the river, flowing through our valley, quite away from the eyes of people. We swore to convert our beautiful dreams into reality. We would confab endlessly from wee hours of morning to late hours of the day on phone. She made me to believe that she loved me hard. Everything was going smooth with us.
But there was, of course, a glitch. I had no job yet and so no financial security. Life doesn’t run on fantasies, money is needed to feed your family. I was still a burden on my dad’s pocket. In such conditions, one can’t afford to persuade parents to tie one in a nuptial knot. I asked Gulshan to wait for me till I get a good job.
However, couple of months before she broke up with me. I sensed a change in her behavior. She was ignoring me, getting angry at little things and abused me for apparently no reasons. She was stone dumb when I would ask her about the change. Day by day, the things got uglier and one evening, she called me on phone, and told me that she wants to break up with me. But before I could open my mouth and ask my fault, she dropped the call and switched off her phone. She had sold her loyalty. Broken and baffled, whole night passed in tears for me. One more dream had shattered miserably. Next morning, a friend of mine came to my house and whispered mockingly in my ear, “Your girlfriend has eloped with someone from our neighboring village.” I was shocked to hear it. The question that haunts me and made me sleepless is that I hadn’t wronged her, why did she cheat on me?
People are now laughing at me and I have become spot of circumstance. Teenagers are chasing me on streets and avail every chance to mock me when I Hubble by. Some have taken to call me vacant, making my life a hell. There is no refuge for me in the inhabited world, so, I have come here to your shack. Though I know that Gulshan is mere an illusion now, but I still continue to linger in memory of that beautiful lady and, I fear, her memory and separation will kill me. Help me Baba”
Upon hearing the plight of Abdullah, Baba said, “Alas! Your name is Abdullah and yet your heart prostrates before the creation of Allah. Alas! You are Abdullah and yet you morn the loss of lady who was not yet lawfully yours. I see you highly impatient and dissatisfied with the decrees of Allah. Haven’t your ears heard of Sabr I Ayoub(AS), a mighty messenger of Allah, who suffered severe pain yet remained strong in his faith and bore all his sufferings without complains. Dear, a believer should know that Allah tests His servants with trials and tribulations. Severe the test, better the reward”.
The sage continued, “Alas! You are Abdullah and yet you say you love truly someone and sing the songs of her beauty. Allah deserves all praise and love. Let you know what true love stands for. True love is divine, unconditional, boundless, boundary less, unshakable in the toughest of times while the materialistic love is ordinary, selfish to its core, darkly rooted in desires and always seeking lusty satisfaction.
Divine love makes us honest. It teaches us to be patient, and to patiently endure all pains and pleasures of life. Divine love is a spring breeze which rejuvenates the soul, and materialistic love is like North wind which lays waste the garden. True love is solution while materialistic love a question in itself. The former is a soulful beauty while the later is a songless tragedy. The true love opens the gates to eternal peace while materialistic love opens the gates of suffering and fear.
True love, the divine, happens rarely. True love is when Prophet Muhammad (pbuh) said that even if Quraish notables put the sun in his right hand and the moon in his left hand, on the condition that he abandons preaching of Allah’s deen, but he SAW refused to give up his religion. True love is when Ibrahim Khalil Ullah (AS) offers himself and all his wealth to a man (who was Gibrael in man’s guise) for having him saying Allah O Akbar. True love is when starved for days together, Bilal (RA) is dragged during the hottest part of day through the streets of Makkah, made to spread his body on burning stand, giant stones placed upon his chest, almost squeezing life out of him. He was asked to denounce Islam yet he would chant “Ahad, Ahad”. True love is when newly married Hanzalah (RA) left his wife’s bed for Jihad and got martyrdom in Allah’s way.
Dear Abdullah, there are no complaints and hardships in divine love but only tranquility and pleasures. If love is must then why to love someone whose love brings you grief and worries. Why not the one whose love fills your heart with cheer and glory? If love is important then Why to love someone whose remembrance brings you despair, why not the one whose remembrance brings you hope and tranquility?
If love is essential then Why to love someone who leaves you midway, why not the one who promises to stand by you all the time? Though we should love our parents, siblings, and everyone else whose love is lawful in Islam but at the same time we should remember that Allah’s love should prevail and dominate all other loves. Material love is only an illusion”
(Bashir Ahmad Dar is a teacher working in education zone Vailoo Anantnag. He can be reached at darbashir1234321@gmail.com)
