The travails of the elderly
By: K S S Pillai
Ours is an ancient culture where children are taught to respect their elders and look after their comforts. The joint-family system, where several generations stayed together, helped to maintain that tradition. That situation has changed with the rapid crumbling of the system, coupled with the emergence of a ‘world village’. The Western practice of children staying independent of their parents once they become self-reliant has caught up with us also.
The other day, an elderly friend rued how people had become insensitive to the travails of the elders and even the differently-abled. Family members have become too busy with their affairs, leaving little time for their elders. Various governments have been trying to be of help, but their actions fall far too short of the requirements of the growing number of the elderly.
Despite the publicity given to a few low-floored buses, the majority of such vehicles have steps too high for the aged. That is also the case with trains. They are always overcrowded, and even the seats meant for the aged and the disabled are occupied by others without any qualms and vacated only reluctantly. Lactating women with babies are seen standing in buses that speed through uneven roads while able-bodied persons are seated.
Though petrol pumps are required to have toilets for the use of the public, many of them remain locked. Getting the key takes time, by which time it may be too late for the elderly. The steps of many such facilities are too high, and so are even the ramps provided in a few for the disabled. An unaccompanied person cannot use such places safely. Many are dirty and without water. Added to the trouble is the absence of European-type toilets in several places.
Offices dealing with the general public are no different. Though they are supposed to be located on the ground floor for the convenience of those categories of people, they are mostly found on higher floors in buildings without lifts or convenient ramps. Even in places like banks with separate lines for senior citizens, most ATMs have steps that are not easy for the disabled to climb.
Airlines appear more concerned about such customers and offer them wheelchair services at airports. Those who push such chairs are also considerate, and I have found their service satisfactory.
The elderly and the handicapped, therefore, opt to remain at home against their wish. They are reluctant to give much trouble to the other members of the family. Though they would like to meet their erstwhile friends and spend some time with them, they go on postponing the visit till they come to know of their death.
They are forced to skip many wedding feasts, as the new fashion of the buffet system requires one to stand in lines for everything from plates to items of eatables. If one likes to have a second helping of something, one has to stand in line again. This practice forces people to heap one’s plates with food, most of which is left uneaten at the end.
Even high-charging hotels are not disabled-friendly. They have bathrooms that close automatically, and the toilets are not often convenient to use. Even the modern beds are too low to get up several times at night.
The problem has been a daunting one for the rich, too. The number of old age homes is increasing, and it is not rare to see children settled in other parts of the country or abroad forced to leave their aged parents to the care of such institutions. Though such highly paid facilities take care of the physical needs of the inmates, the latter miss the earlier family life and pray for a sooner end.
(The author is a retired professor of English. A regular contributor to ‘The Kashmir Vision’, his articles and short stories have appeared in various national and international publications)
