The killer silence
Arsalan Rashie
The birth of a child is considered the most auspicious and graceful moment for every family. A child brings blessings and responsibilities as well for their parents. They put every nerve to nurture them and provide their children with good food, education, care and scarify their desires to render their wishes. They try their best to raise their flowers in comfort. Their health is of utmost priority to them.
With passing time children grow and their mental issues too, which are wittingly and unwittingly ignored by parents. In present times mental health is the most discussed affair. Social media is flooded with mental health posts and hashtags (#).
An ample number of medicos opt for specialization in psychiatry and clinical psychology as the field has a good scope in contemporary times. But the best counselor for everyone is family, especially parents. Ask yourself, have you ever tried to inquire about the mental situation of your children, are you aware of the stress they are going through? I am sure most of you will not have the least idea about it. They may look like green leaves enjoying spring and summer but if you dig deep you will find trodden leaves of autumn.
One of the reasons for a mental illness especially in girls is sexual harassment. Daughters are crowned as princesses but what your princesses and future queens are facing is unimaginable for you. You may have come through many posts, articles and movies about this issue but it would have never crossed your mind that your daughters and sisters suffer the same.
Our society is morally degraded to such an extent that, shockingly, girls are sexually harassed by kiths and kins. By those who were supposed to have fatherly and brotherly feelings, those whom you introduce to our children as “uncles’ ‘ and “brothers’ ‘. Free movements and interactions are allowed to relatives who are the most trustworthy in one’s eyes but might be they are not in your daughter’s eyes.
Some pretend that they respect and love your daughter like you do but they have sweets in their mouth and filth in mind. Parents always try to inculcate good morals in their young ones like how to greet people, to maintain good relations with people we know and to protect them they are taught not to talk to strangers but they are never taught the difference between appropriate and inappropriate touch, how to defend yourself if it comes to your dignity, how to slap and show them we are not dumb when they make you feel uncomfortable so that they can’t do it anymore with anyone who so ever he is. It is a very critical issue that your daughters are harassed by whom you call loved ones, in your own houses and you don’t have any idea about it.
There may be many reasons why they do this shameful act, like late marriage [society is somehow responsible for it] but what about those who are married and do the same. One can’t do anything with their mind except by taking precautions from your side.
The first and the foremost thing to do is never allow anyone to get intimate with your daughter, whoever the person is, whatever the relationship you have with them. Second thing, at least mothers should develop friendly relations with daughters so that they can speak their heart or they can get a gist about her mental condition.
And most important is to trust them when they complain about any such thing because society is not the way you think. Most of the time when girls suffer such things from those whom they thought is their family it takes them much time to understand what is happening to them and when they realize they are not able to communicate with their parents because of the communication gap and fear that they won’t be believed.
If they gather their courage and inform their parents either they are not believed or their mouth is shut just to save their so-called relations and respect. Really!!! This is what happens. Isn’t it horrible that they put their hands on your dignity and just for the reputation you are not able to put limitations on them [culprits]?
Instead of supporting them, you prefer that your daughter suffers mentally and emotionally, it is like burying them alive. It hurts when your parents don’t believe you but it tears one’s soul when you are believed but not protected. It affects their mental health and they become hollow inside, no relation remains trustworthy for them, everything haunts, every person seems like a ghost, every eye feels dirty. It is such a horrible pain with which words can’t do justice.
Just think if a girl is not safe in her own house, in front of her parents between her kiths and kins, where she will beg for security if parents will not secure her. First girls should put all their fears aside and talk about it and instead of cursing her and shutting her mouth, they should take strict action. Because one day you will feel guilty for not raising your voice at a proper time.
It is a slow poison that has entered our society in such a way that even we won’t realize it until it kills our morality and leads to an unhealthy society.
Don’t get used to it. Speak up before it is too late!
(The author is a student currently pursuing a master’s degree at KU)
