Being kind to mother in-law
Rayees Ahmad Kumar
The relationship between a mother and daughter in-law is of prime importance in home affairs. Thousands of families have been destroyed only due to ugly relationship between the two ladies. Sometimes when male members of the family creates an unhealthy environment in the home, upon enquiring it comes to fore that actually it was a lady (mother or daughter in-law) responsible for all that. So to create a pleasant environment and to live peacefully, it is of utmost importance to have a cordial relationship between a mother and her daughter in-law.
Let’s see how a daughter in-law can better please her mother in-law.
1) Daughter in-law must treat her mother in-law exactly like her own mother. Not as a show or through the words but intentionally, she must respect her.
2) She must regard it her duty to respect, love and serve her. To please her and to make her happy, a daughter in-law must play her best role.
3) Sometimes if mother in-law gets angry or she disagrees with daughter in-law on any issue, she should never wrangle with her instead try to please her through patience.
4) Whenever she is asked to do some household work, she must do it with good heart and interest.
5) The wrongs or mistakes of the mother in-law should never be repeated in the parental home nor before any other person. You must live in the new home with patience and if situations go out of control, only the husband should be informed.
6) Whenever you intend to visit your parental home or any other place, always seek permission from the mother in-law and when return back, greet her.
7) If mother in-law has strained relations with any person or family in the neighbourhood, don’t visit there because it will hurt her most. In order to please your mother in-law and to make her happier, always take care of her likes and dislikes.
8) The minute and silly things of mother in-law should never be communicated to your parents nor to the husband.
9) If your husband is taking care of his aged parents as well as looking after his siblings, never be unhappy with him instead play your role in easing your husband to perform this noble duty.
10) Never disgrace or regard your mother in-law as an inferior incase she is an illiterate or old fashioned lady.
11) While serving the mother in-law, think that you are doing a noble deed. In reality you are lessening the burden of your husband. Your husband will feel delighted and the relationship bond too will get strengthened.
12) If mother in-law makes any mistake, never torture her through the venomous words instead seek forgiveness from your own side. Have respect for her old age.
13) Always treat the daughters of your mother in-law with utmost love and affection especially when they are married and visit their parental home.
14) Always take care of the clothes, medicine and other needful items of mother in-law especially when she is ill.
15) During your conversation with the mother in-law, always use descent language. Never use non parliamentary language. Never talk to her like you talk to your friends.
16) In-case your mother in-law is not feeling well and she wants her son to stay in her room during the night, never stop your husband instead give him the permission with good heart to spent time with his mother.
17) Always make judicious use of money and other materials especially during your working in the kitchen. Never exaggerate while consuming and using the kitchen items.
18) If your mother in-law is un-lettered and she is not reading the prayers and other things correctly, guide her to the full extent.
19) If your mother in-law is harshest and ailing you through different means, initially be patient and when things get uncontrollable, inform your husband only and tell him to advice his mother through soft words.
20) Your Mother In-law being in her old age and devoid of her strength and power, you must provide every comfort to her and serve her with good intention. With this your husband would be happy and your own parents too would get the same treatment.
(The author is a columnist, and teaches at Govt Secondary School Anderwan Ganderbal)