No classification please
Rayees Ahmad Kumar
The most common misunderstanding among the people especially among those having materialistic approach is that, a lady working in a government department/ sector or a private company or in any MNC is regarded as a working lady while as a lady who isn’t working in such departments or companies but is doing all the household tasks from dusk to dawn tirelessly like cooking, washing, taking care of children and many other such jobs is called a non working lady or house wife.
Can we call a lady drawing a monthly salary a working lady while the one making our life easy, comfortable and pleasant as a non working lady? No and absolutely never. If we take a review of the daily routine and needs of a home for running smoothly, we come to a conclusion that it is a lady who has made it happen to run the house smoothly and with utmost success.
After a guy has completed his education and also has got a good job in government or private sector, his next priority has always been to marry a good girl. Among many criterions fixed by the people for choosing a ‘to be wife’, one is whether to marry a working lady or a house wife. His own choice, the wish of his parents and the opinion of his close friends or colleagues directly have an impact on his final decision of marrying a working lady or a house wife.
It can be undoubtedly said that the rising inflation and the sky rocketing prices of essentials with each passing day is compelling today’s youth to look for a working match but there are certainly other reasons also because of which they prefer a working lady over a non working one.
Sometimes a government employee or an officer in government sector regards it an insult to choose a non working lady when he finds his own friends or colleagues marrying working ladies. Living a luxurious life, having a better life standard and maximising one’s desires is forcing almost every individual to seek ways for good income from all available means. Marrying a working lady is one such means to increase one’s income to meet his expenses.
However, there is also a good percentage of people who despite being in government service prefer to marry a non working lady. For this they have their own reasons and aspirations. For a good service at home and living their own comfortable and stress free life, they prefer to a have non working lady at home.
Though at the time of wedding or choosing the life partner one feels delighted to have a working partner but after some time things make one realize that he hasn’t taken a good decision. In a joint family often the situation takes an ugly turn and mostly the couple feels worried when the working daughter in-law doesn’t receive a good cooperation from her husband and in-laws.
When the daily servings for the family get delayed due to known reasons everybody in the family gets worried and sometimes force the daughter in-law to say goodbye to her service. A working lady can’t manage her children the way they should be. After coming back from the school when the children find themselves alone in the house and wait for hours together for their parents, their personality isn’t developed properly because parents especially mother’s love, affection and presence is a must in the early few years of the child’s growth and development.
The strong and humanistic fabric of the family gets altogether shattered when parents, children and siblings don’t get required time in expressing their problems or issues and discussing about the proper way out so that each family member can’t feel alienated.
At many instances it has been found that the old age and ailing parents of the working couple were either found dead in their own rooms without being noticed by any family member or were taken to hospitals by the people other than those who are duty bound. Social life of the working couple too gets affected due to their over busy schedule. They can’t reach to their loved ones, near and dears or relatives on the specific occasions.
Due to the over busy schedule, working couple faces many problems and issues both at home as well as outside the home. There is a common saying that “money can’t buy many things”, so a working couple with a materialistic mind of making wealth and gathering all luxuries for their life always find themselves lamenting at the end.
On the other hand a house wife, who always serves her husband with utmost care and honesty, takes care of husband’s ailing and old age parents and manages her children with true spirit of a mother, is regarded as a successful woman by all in and outside the family.
A non working lady can best serve her husband, manage the home and her social life too remains intact. The family members of her home, her neighbours and relatives unanimously praise her for the extraordinary skills of managing the home and taking care of every aspect of family life.
One more important aspect is that the working ladies often become the victims of depression and mental trauma while their non working counterparts often live a happy, prosperous and contended life.
(The author is a columnist and teaches at Govt Secondary School Anderwan Ganderbal)
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