Late marriages proving root of social tribulations
What kind of world we are living where a girl child is neither safe in womb nor in the world
Dr. Jahangeer Ahmad Bhat
The biggest thing in our society is really to worry about ‘late marriages’. In fact, late marriage is the biggest cause of sexual offences, crime, murder and, what not?
It is unfortunate to experience that the wrath of people was not yet extinguished due to a minor rape case of Sumbal area of Bandipora district in north Kashmir another heinous crime occurred in Ganderbal where a teen age girl became a victim of the same menace.
What kind of world we are living in where a girl child is neither safe in womb nor in the world. Living beasts are wondering openly without any sort of hindrance from their parents who could moralise them synchronous to the morals of the society.
In fact the world of pornography, internet and TV has made the youngsters voracious to keep sexual partners. Alas! Parents elatedly overlook the situation. Here comes the responsibility and solicitousness of parents about their child’s behaviour.
I pen down this write up in order to spread a valuable message of responsibility to the parents who borne children and regrettably are unaware to shoulder a proper concern. However, the same is impressed upon the welfare communities of a society to keep a great concern of child’s prepubescent and post- pubescent, causes and symptoms.
Moreover, the scared and pious solution of the whole problem is ‘marriage on time’ and proper child upliftment. In fact, marriage is a bond between a female and a male recognized by custom or law who start living together, having sexual, social, and cultural intimacy and share livelihood to live a life. According to nations it is a “universal social institution”
When an individual is emotionally ready he/she should get nuptial. As per Islamic sharia, the minimum requirements and responsibilities in a Muslim marriage is that a groom provides living expenses (housing, clothing, food, maintenance) to the bride, and in return, the bride’s main responsibility is raising children to be proper Muslims. All other rights and responsibilities are to be decided between the husband and wife, and may even be included as stipulations in the marriage contract before the marriage actually takes place, so long as they do not go against the minimum requirements of the marriage.
Why to get married
Marriage is necessary to hold on your sexual desires confined to your partner hence, no hankering to ramble around to quest the uncouth air. It is where you get a permanent partner who really accompanies you all around. However, when you could found no one to share your emotions with, here is your marriage sine quo non to get relieved and shed your emotions.
Today, unmarried girls in between 25-35 years old are living life with quite self-respect in society. Unfortunately, nobody is going to frown upon them. No one is dare to utter marriage a subject of discussion and nor is any sulking eye- brow raised upon their funny and joyous life style
Unfortunately we could find thousands of girls who are not in a hurry of marrying. The prerequisite aim of their self is to move on with their sound carrier. Today’s parents have full confidence over their children and pressure from their side on children is almost non-existent. They encourage their children to go for higher studies and never care and discuss the matter of marriage until their children reaches post-pubescent. After post-pubescent women often found velleity in their marriage due to infertility or divorce. Hence, indulge in illegal sexual relationships. Even though, the same motivations could come true after their child’s marriage too. However, guardians are unaware that their dissonant steps would lead them at the doom. In fact, Girls too are not perturbing over the score of their marriages nor are they feeling any sagacity of fault about it. They want to ponder over every aspect of married life before stepping into the canopy of marriage. And slowly but steadily, the society too, has begun accepting this norm of late marriages. I don’t take side of the boys but recent studies tells us about the scores of women who has crossed the age of 40 and yet to get married.
Causes behind late marriage
The world of TV and internet has turned the cultures of the entire countries of theworld in one single colour. Of late, we have started on exchanging cultures as well. Marriage is now not associated with age. Marriages are now being solemnised in the ages of 35-40, 45-50 years also.
Maturity in girls have enhanced up aplenty. She wants such a companion who could bear her attitude, should have money, position, power and above all emotionally supportive too. People are now more likely to be materialistic and marriages are now becoming optional in this era, where everybody is struggling for getting more and more riches in order to have better living standards. They are afraid of losing their social and economic freedom which understandably is a part of getting married. Achieving high social status is one of the major factors in late marriages. Today’s live generation are inclined towards luxurious life and for meeting this demand they spend most of their time in making money even at the cost of ignoring one of the most important social institution of life. One of the changing trends for delaying marriage is closely associated with “rise in educational attachment”.
It is identified that increased motivation to attain education in women, the cast system, idealism regarding luxurious life by practicing hyper gamy and economic stability are the major causes of late marriages. Due to late marriages the fertility rate in male and females are affected. The effect of late marriage is not only on females but males too are the reason behind infertility due to which difficulties in conceiving baby occur.
During family functions, questions like “When the marriage is going to be held” are no more asked now. This question has been replaced with, “What is your daughter doing?” Parents feel proud to talk of the achievements and success attained by daughters. From this, the daughters too feel encouraged and bold and their attitude too changes.
(The writer is a faculty member at P G College Rajouri)
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